Thursday, January 21, 2016

Remembering Robin

Rabbi Philip Weintraub
Congregation Agudas Israel
1/21/2016

In all of our lives, there are people that touch our hearts and touch our souls.  Whether in our lives for short periods or long, their impact is felt long after they are gone or the relationship fades.  In the Torah this week, we read of the splitting of the sea, of the rejoicing.  We sing aloud the song of the sea, Az Yashir Moshe, the song that Moses sang, then just when the song is over, we find that Miriam also had something to say:

.וַתִּקַּח֩ מִרְיָ֨ם הַנְּבִיאָ֜ה אֲח֧וֹת אַהֲרֹ֛ן אֶת־הַתֹּ֖ף בְּיָדָ֑הּ וַתֵּצֶ֤אןָ  כָֽל־הַנָּשִׁים֙ אַחֲרֶ֔יהָ בְּתֻפִּ֖ים וּבִמְחֹלֹֽת
And Miriam the prophetess, the sister of Aaron, took a timbrel in her hand; and all the women went out after her with timbrels and with dances.

Miriam’s voice was powerful; it was strong; it inspired all those around her.  She didn’t need twenty verses to teach the most important message of all--that this was a time to celebrate.  Sometimes we need a reminder to celebrate.  Sometimes the obvious is not clear to us.  Sometimes we need to know what is most important, to remind you of what really matters.

In my life, Robin Royal Kirby, was one such person.  She knew what was important and she wasn’t afraid to tell you.  She could inspire joy, help you celebrate and was always ready to help you see what was in front of you.  She was my Hebrew School teacher, pushing me to study, to learn, to grow in my Jewish faith and traditions.  She was an exemplar, showing her faith and her love of our heritage.  She kvelled when we had our Bar and Bat Mitzvahs, pushing us to be prepared and be ready to be active religiously.

When she became the youth advisor and youth director of Congregation Beth Shalom, she dragged our tuchuses to USY, whether we wanted to or not.  My freshman year of high school, I was not involved in USY.  I didn’t go to anything and spent most Saturday mornings catching up on sleep.  One day she approached me at shul and said, you are coming to Regional convention.  You are going to get on the bus to Florida with 50 other Jewish kids and you are going to love it.  Somehow my parents and I said yes, and she was right.  With her influence, USY became my life until I graduated.  She pushed us to learn how to daven, to sing and bentch with all of our souls.  She danced her heart out on the bus, helped us through our USY relationships.  Robin helped us be silly and goofy, but made sure that we understood the consequences if we crossed the line.  From organizing local events to getting us across the country, Robin was there, celebrating and inspiring and dancing and teaching.

With the leadership experience I gained in USY, the rabbinate became my path.  It was in the parking lot after a subregional convention that I found out I was going to Brandeis, helping me along my spiritual journey--which without Robin--would probably be a future in a totally different field.


יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בֶּן פְּרַחְיָה אוֹמֵר, עֲשֵׂה לְךָ רַב, וּקְנֵה לְךָ חָבֵר, וֶהֱוֵי דָן אֶת כָּל הָאָדָם לְכַף זְכוּת:
Yehoshua ben Perachia says, "Make for yourself a mentor, acquire for yourself a friend and judge every person as meritorious."

In our USY campaigns, she taught us Pirkei Avot and reminded us that it wasn’t the only Torah text out there.  In her memory, I think of 1:6, which truly represents her.  She was a mentor; she was a friend and she taught us all to find the holiness in every one--even if they punched through a window--but that’s a story for another day.
I spent Wednesday sick (physically and emotionally) and hoping the news was not true.  How could there be a world without her in it?  When it became clear that this was not some horrible rumor, it became even more painful to know that I am unlikely to physically be at the funeral.  (Snow, snow, go away, come again some other winter day!)  Yet amidst the pain, I know her memory will be a blessing.  She brought light and love into the world.  She pushed us to be our best.  She taught many future rabbis what it means to BE a rabbi, to be a teacher, to live a life of integrity.
Just a few months ago, we celebrated a beautiful wedding of dear friends.  Many of USY crowd was there, and Mama Chili, looked like she could burst.  She was so proud of the lives that we lead, of the love that we have, of the spirit that we bring to the world.  Her influence is so clear among those whose lives she touched.  Whether she was there for a short time or a long time in our lives, her love will always be felt.
Baby Got Back.